Wednesday, January 11, 2006

In lighter moment
"Item-sky is the limit" to be imposed on Nepal 's mother nature

N.P.UPADHYAYA

It so happened this year that we the Kathmanduites have had a very short winter. Or else, this time around, the entire of Kathmandu valley wore a deserted look even early evening. However, the fact is that this is not so this time. Days have become longer as it should be. But talking of the intense and unbearable winter as usual, it is not that and the people, more so of the poor lot, have taken a sigh of relief.

It is in the periphery of this changing mood of the nature, we have tried to, indeed in a jocular fashion, present some views of one media man, one political personality and a human Right activist in this regard. Please take the conversations in a lighter mood.

The meeting place of these gentlemen is a five star hotel where a cocktail reception is being held by one very "influential" diplomatic mission which more often than not pokes its nose into Nepal 's internal affairs.

The talk begins.

Media man: The change of the mood of the nature is a violation of the Press Freedom.

Political man: But how? The HR man also gets pretty interested and joins the HR questions.

Media man: It's very simple. The nature this time has sided with the regressive forces by forcing us to get up early from the beds and go to our works. Or else, if the winter were intense as usual, we the media men would have found much time to keep ourselves within the fold of our private quilts! More over, I like the fogs. But no fogs this time. Mother nature has violated my rights to have fogs.

HR and Political man: Sounds logical indeed. However, they add by saying that the sudden change in the mood of the nature was hazardous for health also. They then predict that many minor cases of health disorders would be registered in the Hospitals, which might reduce the numbers of the "people" to come to the streets in support of theirscheduled agitation.

Both agree that the nature this time had sided with the establishment and gone against the seven party agitations. Both see the hands of China or for that matter Pakistan factor. He doubts the invisible hands of Doud Ibrahim and his colleagues.

HR man: I also see the nature not to be kind enough towards our endeavors.

But how? Exclaim the rest two.

HR man: It is very plain and simple. The change in mood of the winter has forced us all to begin working right from the early morning. Had the winter been a trembling one, we would not have been forced to collect the details of the abuses committed by the RNA men right from the early morning. Now that some one is "sponsoring" our jobs, we have to remain sincere to the person who has told us to collect the details even if it were a fake one. In addition to all these, terrible winters forces me and my friends to come together for drinks albeit of the type of alcohol. It is different that I never foot the bills. Friends do it for me. But the early commencement of summer has put waters on my inviolable rights. I must talk to Fan Chartin. I will tell him straight and hopefully he will get the sanction of Houis Harbour who is monitoring all the cases of Nepal .

It is in direct violation with the established norms and the practices of one individual's rights that are enshrined in scores of internationals charters and covenants.

I think the nature too is going the wrong way than what our foreign friends instigating us have acquired in this regard. Hell with the regressive nature. Hell with the ending winter! Hell with the Mother nature!

He even sees the need for a sort of convention in this regard in order to denounce the mood of the Mother Nature.

The other two also chant slogans against Mother Nature.

The political man: Well, I see a great conspiracy of the Americans in this matter.

How come the Americans in this mood imbroglio? Ask the rest of the two.

Pol. Man: Well! Well!! Don't trust the Americans. I think that the Americans have a dual policy on Nepali matters. Neither they abandon the monarchy nor would leave us all in the mid-stream.

But how could it be that way? Ask the two brains.

Pol. Man: Since they don't trust the intent of the Maoists even after the 12 point agreement so this ruse brings them closer to the establishment or for that matter with the monarchy. As regards democracy they are with the agitating parties because they also suspect the King's words that he would handover a restored system to the political parties. I see this is very dangerous posture. You can't be with both. Chose one: either you are with the King or with the agitators.

HR and Media man: I see logic here. We are dismayed at the fact that in the recent days, a handful of brilliant Americans have begun writing articles wherein they paint a very black picture of the political parties and those of the Maoists. A blatant case of the abuse of media freedom in the States. We should convince the Nepal Bar Association to issue a strong worded statement to denounce the American writers for what they have written against us.

Pol. Man: But tell me whom those guys were hell bent on tarnishing our image in Nepal ?

Media man: Oh It is Robert D. Kaplan( see Washington Post dated Dec. 20 last year) and very freshly Thomas A Marks, a risk consultant in the USA ( see Nepaleyes.com) which is supposed to be closer to the Bush Administration.

Media man: I will talk to my friends at the office and urge them to prepare a statement denouncing the two US writers. We will demand apology from the two. We will even bring out demonstrations against their "provocative" write-ups and manage its telecast from our chum TVs and FMs.

It is decided that a secret letter should be drafted and sent to President Bush through Ambassador Moriarty wherein an appeal will be made to Bush to devise schemes and tricks to penalize mother nature.

Suddenly, the waiters attending at the reception informs the three "Nepali dignitaries" that the party time had been over and they had to leave the hall at the earliest.

However, one of the waiter who was listening to their irrelevant but yet illuminating talks and the analyses being furnished thereof told them that since the population of Kathmandu was growing in an astronomical manner, mother nature has been forced to change her regular mood. More so, the waiter continued, since the westerly winds now blowing in the entire Terai belt do not get a chance to penetrate into the surrounding mountain range in the Kathmandu valley, the winter this time appears to have shortened. The waiter saw no political game in this regard.

How much the three luminaries understood in the condition wherein they were at that point of time from what had been said by a waiter, is any body's guess.

Some days later, I am told that Ratnapark witnessed a huge demonstration wherein an effigy of Mother Nature was burnt.

The security personnel attending the demonstration and the onlookers in sizeable numbers who usually come to Ratnapark to spend some time to relax, however, are yet to link the reasons of the said demonstration with the change of nature's mood.

I am told that this demonstration has stirred the minds of the Ratnapark academia who appear hell bent on Gheraoing the Vice Chancellor of the Tribhuban University suggesting him to delete the text of the mother nature which the Varsity has in its Masters Level (Environment, Population Control and the Role of Mother Nature) curricula as a token of their protest.

International media too have taken a serious note of the deteriorating Nepal nature. The UN, I am told, is to send a very high-powered team to "study" the emerging Nepali "situation" in "details". The report, if approved will be endorsed by the "hate and press-Nepal conglomerate", as "item-sky is the limit" and will be put to the perusal of other UN members in " Geneva ".

The political parties now in agitation have become suddenly happy for having been remained successful in "insulting" their own "mother" in the international community. Indeed they have reasons to be excited.