|
 Funnier AGMs!
This is the season of Annual General Meetings. Everyday at least half a dozen AGMs of different companies take place in the posh hotels and conference halls of the city.
In the good old days, these AGMs used to be crowded like our cinema halls of the past decade as many of shareholders who had nothing better to do would attend these AGMs only for high tea or lunch box and a hundred or so Rupees that the companies used to dole out to each attendee. But these days we witness a sea change in such AGMs. An AGM these days has only about a dozen of shareholders and a few invited and many uninvited journalists. As a result, many of the AGMs turn breeding grounds for unintentional humour.
The formal programme begins stoically through the agenda with rare interruption. The items drop off one by one: apologies, minutes of last AGM, the Chairman presenting Annual Report. Of course, every thing in a routine fashion. Discussion ends with a note on hiking board meeting allowance.
It suddenly becomes interesting when somebody asks for the meaning of some of the Greek and Latin words that appear in the Annual Report. Again someone asks for clarifications about suspicious financial activities by the officials of the company. The questions will also be raised regarding issues like the dividend declared or the possibility of the bonus or the future price of the company in the NEPSE index.
Somehow, the distraction is calmed down and then appear the CEO and Managing Director in front of the mike, and many begin to yawn. Their long speeches full of comparisons of this year's progress and profit with that of previous year work as sleeping tablets for many of the audience. If there is anything more than that in their speeches, they are patting some mangers on their back and bashing the government.
Immediately after the boring speeches of CEO and MD are over the MC invites the chairman to deliver a speech. Then it is the turn of the vice chairman. COO must also speak. Representatives of the central bank or the authorities think delivering speeches on such occasion is their birthright.
There are also few guests from various departments of the government and semi-government organizations on the dais without whose speech the AGM would be incomplete. Some of them have the exemplary knack to make a speech full of jokes (though the speaker himself may not intend it to be like that). The big people from the dais have the typical role of highlighting the importance of CA polls and the contribution that tourism or hydropower can make to the growth of country's economy.
Meanwhile, a shareholder stands and bombards with questions before question and answer session actually begins, which amuses the guests bored with irrelevant speeches of so many people. The chairman simply refuses to respond the untimely query. Instead he asks 'one husband and five wife (WH) questions' like: How many shares of this company have you bought? Who were they bought from and sold to? What are the prices of purchase and the prices of subsequent sale of each? What costs were incurred during purchase and sale of each?
The discussion takes no direction; neither do the shareholders expect the right answer from the directors of the board for the questions. Then it is lunch time and everybody rushes to pick up his or her lunchbox. If it is evening, it is time for cocktail and dinner.
If you have thought the past AGMs were funny, you are surely wrong. I promise you the coming AGMs will be funnier once the trade unionists enter the company boards.
|
