Present Women’s empowerment programs need fundamental change to be effective

By Rajeeb Satyal, Managing Director ( Social Marketing/Management Consultant)

The present programs designed and developed so far to address gender balance and women empowerment needs fundamental change if it is to create any noticeable impact in the future. The genuine gender problems faced by innocent female population is far from being solved, but rather caused more harm as a result of stereo typed and meaningless clamors. It is only few women activists who have so far gained media attention, fame and awards.

One of the reasons for such grave failure or mediocrity to improve gender balance in the country is clearly the lack of understanding of the holistic and deeper aspect of the issue, prevalence of hypocrisy and convergent thinking, and finally the inability to link the issue to the day-to-day realities faced by the common women. There already have been various strategic, programmatic and fundamental blunders that need corrections at different levels.

Over-intellectualization: Like in any other issues, the issue of gender balance and women empowerment have been over-intellectualized and therefore are least likely to create any impact in the day-to-day lives of common women. Basically, gender balance or women empowerment program should be able impact lives of common women, as well as men (in relation to women) at various levels such as - Feeling and emotional levels where they should feel better about themselves and their lives. - Day to day routine level where they have choices on how they want to spend their lives including what and when they want to eat, sleep, watch TV and etc. - Career/life style level where they should feel empowered to have choices on their education, career, glamour, fashion, and relationship they want to maintain with other people they like. - Behavioral level where they have choice on how they want to behave, and to be behaved with respect and dignity - Primal level where, how, when and with whom they want to have sex and to enjoy life the way they want.

The present women empowerment programs do not address any of the primal and basic issues that in fact affect the women in real sense and on day-to-day basis. The women’s empowerment program will be successful on the day when it is realized that it is the women themselves, most importantly the young ones, who have right to define their needs, as well as the kind of empowerment they would like to have. Not something forced upon them as "women empowerment" by some outdated fanatics.

What has so far been done so far in this area has undermined women’s genuine right to think, act and take charge of their own lives as decent human being.

The advocacy for equal division of hereditary properly among sons and daughter may look so generous and effective in the short term but nowhere near to providing the women what is rightfully theirs to spend a decent life. I would say, Nepal must immediately abandon its cultural and legal custom of hereditary property. Because it is one of the key reasons that is responsible for Nepal’s poor economy, as it has made almost all cream middle class youths dependent and greedy.

All of us feel so shy to talk about our primal needs such as crave for love lust and sex. We are depriving women to make their choice and rights on these issues. No women rightists have ever talked about women’s needs to choose their own moral definitions, and needs.

Finally to close this chapter is – the basic mundane aspect of life, Daal Bhaat Tarkari life style that has also caused great injustice to women. Usually we eat Daal Bhaat two times a day, for which women alone has to rise early to prepare. Expecting husband’s help in the kitchen, irrespective of their apparent modern outlook is so remote. So she is compelled to get up early in the morning, all by herself to prepare Daal Bhaat irrespective of her will, education background, career and etc. She remains busy during the whole morning feeding the family and preparing the children for school, and throughout the whole day in her office if she is employed or in her household chores if she is so called housewife (I would have felt humiliated if I was called a house-husband). When she comes back tired from the office, once again she has to prepare evening Daal Bhaat Tarkari for the family, which extends up to late night, and again her husband do not extend any helping hands. When she finally finishes her final household chore and come to bed, she still has another duty to fulfill. To be ready to have sex with her husband, with or without her will. Hence, the day-to-day Daal Bhaat Tarkari life style has deprived women from their basic rights. To address this problem, we need to give close look at our life style and find innovative way where both gender share household also.

Well, there is lot more to understand. These are only a tip of an iceberg. There are definitely deeper issues, than advocating for equal division of hereditary parental property. What we must do to effectively empower women is to allow them to make their own decision, empower them to set their own moral standard, and morality, in terms of their basic and primal needs, and finally liberate ourselves from our heavy sexual taboo. It is men and those activist women who need to look at their own lives and change first.

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