With malice to none
"Threat", "To", Democracy"—a case of newly born triplets

Once it so happened that a newly married couple began quarrelling for some interesting reason. The dialogue that took place in between the two is as follows:

Husband: I wonder why you dislike me?

Wife: It’s not that I dislike you. What I don’t like in you is in fact your attitude of dominating me every time for unknown reasons.

Husband: I’m not dominating you. Neither I can afford to do so.

Wife: But I see a threat to my personality.

Husband: How I pose a threat to you?

Wife: You belong to a society where male dominate the scene and it is always the women folks who become the victim and hence I see a threat to my freedom in your house. There is no gender equality in our society at all even if Dr. Durga Pokhrel chairs a commission that has been told to look after the cases of women in the society.

Husband: All rubbish!

Wife: I totally disagree with you and your dismissal. It could be a threat not only for my life but it might time permitting emerge as a threat to democratic system as well.

Husband: But how you would explain that my behavior towards you could be a threat to country’s system of governance?

Wife: Well! If you push me to the wall, I might establish a NGO that will be manned only by those women folks who either have been rejected by their husbands or in reality possess a strong desire to work for the upliftment of the women population which is perhaps fifty-fifty in Nepal’s case.

Husband: But who will foot the bills of the NGO?

Wife: That’s very easy. We all thus housed in the NGO will catch one MURGA and that’s all.

Husband: But what is this Murga? Who is this Murga?

Wife: Murga is the one who gets seduced to our proposals. Normally in Nepal a person is called a Murga if he or she is skillfully cheated by persons like us. It could be a minister or for that matter an international donor.

Husband: But what is the guarantee that any donor agency would come to your support?

Wife: We will convince the donor(s). We will tell the interested agencies that Nepali women neither possess freedom nor taken as equals in the society. We will expose how we the women folks have been denied participation in the parliament. Can you count the females folks enjoying high bureaucratic posts? Tell me how many women were pilots and general managers in this country?

Husband: But your women folks appear in advertisements wherein they willingly expose themselves that gives very bad taste to the TV viewers. Don’t you think that your own community members are abusing the freedom thus provided by the state to them?

Wife: I would prefer a no comment on this topic. You can proceed with your comments in this regard.

Husband: But you were talking of yours becoming a threat to the system? But how?

Wife: It’s very simple.

Husband: Proceed.

Wife: When you will increase pressure on me, I will react. And when you will react, as a matter of rule, I will double the intensity of my voice. Listening to my outrageous voice, you will loose your temper. And when one looses his or her temper, one normally gets overly excited and out of that excitement you will presumably begin manhandling which in turn will force me to treat you the same manner as you did with me only freshly.

Husband: But come to the point!

Wife: As a rule, I will cry louder and with the open windows people in the neighborhood, specially the women folks, will listen to my weeping voice which I suppose will be sufficient to prove you guilty.

Husband: But this doesn’t pose a threat to democracy?

Wife: The next morning, the women folks will converge and will definitely take my side. Later we will form an adhoc committee that will submit a memorandum to the Prime Minister. An ultimatum would be served on the Prime Minister who will be told to look into the gender-equality issues and that too with forty days.

Husband: Proceed.

Wife: I know that the non-performing Prime Minister has other pressing issues so he will throw our memorandum in the dust bin which means that he paves the way for a grand rally and demonstration in Kathmandu.

Husband: But how will you bring in female folks from the districts for the purpose of demonstration?

Wife: We have an agency that if provided a fair amount does these things. All that you have to do is to inform the agency in advance of the date, venue and the numerical strength of the men to be invited for the grand demonstration. On time the agency brings in the processionists and chants slogans against the state and packs up when the allotted time is over.

Husband: Terrible indeed. Now I got the point how the UML and the Congress manage such crowd even at time of the winter. But who pays for the tickets?

Wife: Surely the party pay for the tickets. I don’t know where from the party receives fund. This part is not transparent indeed.

Husband: Now resume your talk on the supposed threat to democracy.

Wife: Even if the Chand government dismisses our ultimatum, I will convince Girija babu and Madhav Nepal to convince some neighboring leaders to converge in Kathmandu and cry foul of the sort of the 1990 which provided fuel to the fire then.

Since it had become already too late for both the couple to continue the talks as they had become sleepy and hence both discontinued their debate. As could be expected, they enjoyed the rest of the hours together in the bed.

Ten months hence of the interesting debate, the wife gave birth to three sons, a triplet case indeed. The couple gave the newly born kids the following names. The first was called "Threat". The second was given the name "To" and the third got "Democracy".

We have been told that the now grown up triplets have been employed by Girija Prasad and Madhav Nepal. But this has yet to be verified. If they are not then I will inform you in my next issue.

Headline | National | 5 Question  | Editorial | International | Past