The Olympian tiger and a cat

N.P. Upadhyaya

An interesting joke that is widely in circulation in Kathmandu runs like this:

The recently concluded Sydney Olympics this round had included in its team of events also the CAT marathon. Cats from various countries of the globe took part in the event of its own kind held in Australia. Prominent among the cats selected for the event were from United States of America, the United Kingdom, France, Germany, and Somalia.

Before the countdown began, most of the spectators guessed that it would be the cat from the United States or else from the United Kingdom coming out with flying colors in the said event. They also concluded that the prospects of the cats from other participating countries were simply bleak.

On time, the race was declared open. But Lo! Contrary to the expectations and the early predictions of the millions of spectators seated in the Stadium, the lean and thin cat from SOMALIA bagged the first prize to the utter dismay of the rest of the participants.

An annoyed and astonished UK cat could not control his temptation and decided to ask the Somalian cat on the mystery of his victory in the marathon event.

The Somalian cat preferred not to answer the awkward question posed to him by the one from the United Kingdom. The UK cat, however, insisted that he divulge the mystery of his surprising victory. The Somalian cat refused to comply. This made the rest of the cats more anxious to know about Somalian cats’ victory.

Finally, the Somalian athlete yielded to his friends’ pressure but yet told them that he would comply to their requests only after he gets the Medal. His friends agreed.

The referee or say the umpire awarded the first prize Gold medal to the Somalian athlete.

Now it was time to lay bare open the secret of his victory by the Somalian cat. The Somalian cat says: (sic)" Look friends! In fact I’m not a cat. I’m a Tiger basically. However, the continued draught and poverty in my country for years and years made me lean and thin and hence my whole ‘personality’ has been reduced to this shape what you call or have taken me as a cat. It is all due to "no food" for months and months that has made me to look like a cat. Oh! The poverty factor in my country is serious. Next Olympic, most of my brethren will come to attend such marathons and perhaps will bag victory over you all from the rich countries."

The other participants got the point instantly.

The fact is that such situation might follow us soon. This Kingdom, till a decade and a halfback was basically a grain exporting country. Now we import. Till five decades back, we had lush green forests that stretched hundreds and hundreds miles. Our Terai plains were till the other day called the store of paddy. We have denuded our forests for our personal and at times political benefits. "Green Forests, Nepal’s Riches", was the slogan till a decade back. We don’t pronounce that slogan any more because it is not that today as per the old slogan. This has badly affected our climatic conditions and we get less or no water during the monsoon period that ultimately effects the grain production and hence the poverty related deaths. Or at times we have incessant rains for days and nights that not only damage our crops but also disfigure our roads. Consider the deaths of the Humlis and the Jumlis last year due to starvation. Thanks the Nepali media that reported about this appalling starvation caused deaths of our brethren in that area. No wonder that some Nepali areas in the west don’t have a pinch of salt for their use.

The debt burden is swelling, we are told. The economy is about to collapse. Strikes and repeated bundhs all have caused irreparable damages to our fledgling economy. Add to this the acts of rampant corruption and that too at the highest political levels plus the bureaucracy.

Donors have become already cautious and sound at times their concern over the utilization of the funds in the projects. Add to this the Maoists insurgency and their supposed control of some good number of far-flung areas in their control. The mal-governance of the previous governments apparently too have forced the unemployed youths to join the bands of the insurgents. The yet to be settled KAMAIYAS perhaps one fine morning too will embrace the Maoists in the jungles. Some have already assimilated into the Maoists mainstream. The dalits have their own story to tell.

No wonder we will some time later assume the figure and the role of the Somalian tiger. (Reproduced in the readers’ interest).

Headline | Opinion | Dateline | National |  5 Question  | Editorial | Letter | Views | International | Past